The Scarlett Letters - News

REDHEAD SPOTLIGHT: Discrimination Pushes A Ginger Over the Edge

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Wed, 21 Jul 2010 09:18:00 -0500

Imagine the ending of this headline: Man shoots himself and mother because of ________.

a) His crystal meth addiction

b) He was breast fed until the age of 10

c) He felt discriminated against as a redhead

Correct Answer: C

As a self proclaimed “ginger” celebrator and general reveler of all things carrot-top, strawberry-blond and flaming fabulousness, you can imagine my surprise, shock, awe and general bafflement at this story!

Clearly this man was one book shy of a full library but seriously - What’s so wrong with redheads anyway!?

Frankly, makes me wonder if there’s something to the phrase “beating like a redheaded step-child.”

Suspended Paramedic Trent Speering 'Sent Redhead Rant' Before Murder-Suicide

Suspended Sydney paramedic Trent Speering fumed that the NSW Ambulance Service was run by "degenerates" and was bigoted towards redheads before shooting dead his elderly mother and himself, a court has been told.

On June 11, 2008, the 40-year-old visited his 70-year-old mother, Monica Speering, at her home in Baulkham Hills, Sydney, and shot her twice in the head before covering her with a blanket and resting her head on a pillow, The Daily Telegraph reports.

Mr Speering then killed himself, a coronial inquest into both deaths heard today.

The day after the shootings, the Daily Telegraph opened a letter to the editor from Mr Speering detailing the reasons for his actions.

John Agius, counsel assisting the coroner, outlined some of contents of the letter in the NSW Coroners Court today.

"There are two main reasons as to why I've taken the action I have,'' Mr Agius read from the letter.

"One is that there is a lot of bigotry towards people with red hair in this workplace ... and I've copped my share in my lifetime...

"I work for the Ambulance Service of NSW and you would be hard pressed to find an organisation more morally bankrupt, and run by a bigger bunch of degenerates if you tried.''

Mr Speering went on to say that he would kill his mother and himself.

The letter triggered a police investigation but officers arrived at the house too late.

Mr Agius told coroner Mary Jerram that repeated recommendations from paramedic colleagues and medical experts that Mr Speering undergo a psychological assessment, had not been adopted.

"There are issues here about the duty of care for the ambulance service to Mr Speering as an employee ... given what the ambulance service ought to have known of Mr Speering's mental state,'' he said.

The inquest, set down for two weeks, is due to hear from numerous witnesses, including senior NSW Ambulance management.

Redhead Spotlight #28

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Tue, 29 Jun 2010 10:08:40 -0500

Spy Ring's 'Femme Fatale'

By BRUCE GOLDING, ANDY SOLTIS and CATHY BURKE

A ring of 10 Russian moles right out of a Cold War spy novel was smashed yesterday — and among those busted was a flame-haired, 007-worthy beauty who flitted from high-profile parties to top-secret meetings around Manhattan.

Russian national Anna Chapman — a 28-year-old divorcee with a masters in economics, an online real-estate business, a fancy Financial District apartment and a Victoria’s Secret body — had been passing information to a Russian government official every Wednesday since January, authorities charged.

In one particularly slick spy exchange on St. Patrick’s Day, Chapman pulled a laptop out of a tote bag in a bookstore at Warren and Greenwich streets in the West Village while her handler lurked outside, receiving her message on his own computer, the feds said. A similar exchange occurred at a Midtown coffee shop at 47th Street and 8th Ave.

The FBI claimed the two were corresponding via a secret online network.

Last week, an undercover agent pretending to be a Russian official arranged a meeting to talk about the weekly laptop exchanges, pretending to be ready to send the sexy spy on a mission to deliver a fake passport to another female agent, according to the federal complaint.

"Are you ready for this step?" he asked. "S¤-¤-¤-, yes," Chapman allegedly gushed.

The undercover instructed her on how she would recognize her fellow spy and how to report back on the handoff, the feds said.

"Haven’t we met in California last summer?" the spy expecting the fake passport was supposed to say. Chapman was to respond, "No, I think it was the Hamptons," according to the FBI.

Chapman allegedly was also supposed to hold a magazine under her arm so her counterpart would recognize her, and plant a stamp on a wall map indicate the handoff was a success.

It never took place.

Another spy-movie-like maneuver took place in Brooklyn shortly after the meeting with the undercover agent when Chapman darted into a Verizon phone store to buy a cell using the name Irine Kutsov, and an address of "99 Fake Street," the feds said. She only planned to use the phone to "avoid detection of her conversations," the FBI alleged.

At her arraignment last night, she was held without bail as federal prosecutor Michael Farbiarz called her a "highly trained agent" and a "practiced deceiver."

The other suspects, including four middle-aged couples living seemingly ordinary professional lives, were supplied with bogus names and documents and told by Moscow to become "Americanized," infiltrate "policymaking circles" in the United States and send secrets back to the Kremlin, the feds said.

All allegedly were on deep-cover assignments and schooled in spying tradecraft — from using high-tech methods like digital gadgets to traditional methods like invisible ink, sending encoded radio bursts of data and using innocent-looking "brush-by" encounters to pass documents.

Among the extraordinary allegations detailed in documents filed in Manhattan federal court yesterday:

A senior Russian spy who used the name Christopher Metsos served as a go-between for agents across the country. He buried cash under five inches of dirt in upstate Wurtsboro that was dug up two years later by a Yonkers couple who were members of the ring.

Metsos turned over an orange bag of cash to a Russian government official in May 2004 when they passed one another on a stairway at the Forest Hills, Queens, LIRR stop.

Other handovers and meetings between spies occurred in a Fort Greene, Brooklyn, coffee shop, a Sunnyside, Queens, restaurant and a subway entrance at Columbus Circle, the feds said.

In May 2006, spies based in Boston gave their handlers information about changes at the CIA and about the 2008 presidential election. The information came from a well-connected "former legislative counsel for the US Congress," they told Moscow.

The Boston spies also boasted in 2004 that one of their agents had talks with a US nuclear expert about research on bunker-buster warheads.

A spy in Montclair, NJ, who used the name Cynthia Murphy, told Moscow in February 2009 that she had "several work-related personal meetings" with a prominent New York financier, who was a big campaign fund-raiser and friend of a former Cabinet member.

"Of course, he is a very interesting target," Moscow replied.

Her husband, who used the name Richard Murphy, was told last January how he would be able to identify another spy when he traveled to Rome to get a bogus Irish passport.

"Excuse me, could we have met in Malta in 1999?" he was told to ask.

If the contact was legitimate, he would reply, "Yes, indeed I was in La Valetta, but in 2000."

But if his contact was carrying a copy of Time magazine in his left hand, it was a signal that the meeting was in danger, according to the instructions from Moscow.

"You were sent to USA for long-term service trip," one message said. "Your education, bank accounts, car, house etc. — all these serve one goal: fulfill your main mission, i.e. to search and develop ties in policymaking circles in US and [send] intels."

The court documents also reveal day-to-day travails of the spy business.

Last March, two of the suspects were watched as they met at a payphone at DeKalb and Vanderbilt avenues in Brooklyn. They went from there to a coffee house for a long chat. One alleged agent complained about the computer Moscow had given him.

"They don’t understand what we go through over here," he kvetched.

Before they left, one spy gave the other a package believed to contain cash, the feds said.

Moscow Center, the infamous headquarters of Russian intelligence going back decades, closely monitored how much it was spending. In one message, it listed all the expenses for two Boston spies, including $8,500 for rent, $160 for telephone and $180 for a car lease.

The Yonkers spies, meanwhile, struggled financially, and after one of them flew to an unidentified South American country to collect eight bags each packed with $10,000, he used some of it to pay off nearly $8,000 in back taxes to the country and city, the FBI said.

Neighbors of the suspects were stunned.

The two Montclair "Murphys" moved to the neighborhood about a year ago and were described by one neighbor as very normal. "They were suburbia personified," he said. Near the crowded, book-filled Yonkers home of suspect Vicky Pelaez — an op-ed columnist for El Diario — and another defendant, Juan Lazaro, neighbors were stunned.

One, Ellen Shaffren, said that the couple had lived there 12 to 15 years and that one of their two sons is a piano prodigy.

Shaffren said Lazaro was an economics professor.

Two other defendants, Michael Zottoli and Patricia Mills, were arrested at their residence in Arlington, Va.

Mikhail Semenko, was busted Sunday at his home in Arlington.

Donald Howard Heathfield and Tracey Lee Ann Foley, were arrested at their Boston residence Sunday.

Outside their home near Harvard Square, local residents said the couple never quite fit in the offbeat neighborhood.

"There was no interaction," said neighbor Lila Hexner. "Everything was very nondescript."

Metsos, who apparently was able to enter the United States repeatedly over several year, is not in custody.

Each of the 10 arrested was charged with conspiracy to act as an agent of a foreign government, which carries a maximum penalty of five years in prison on conviction.

Nine were charged with conspiracy to commit money laundering, which carries a maximum 20 years in prison.

Additional reporting by Perry Chiaramonte, Erin Calabrese, Rebecca Rosenberg and Doug Montero in New York and Marcia Harrison in Boston

The Silver Line-ing?

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Wed, 11 Mar 2009 11:19:22 -0500

The announcement that the brand new 23 mile long ‘silver line’ that metro will construct for the bargain price of $1.63 billion has made DC all a twitter. Personally, it leaves me less than thrilled.

While the inception of the Silver Line carries with it the ability to schlep my pedestrian ass out to Tysons Corner – a luxury once reserved for the vehicle owning and/or ride-mooching residents of DC – thus multiplying potential opportunities to ‘stimulate’ the economy exponentially, this is hardly the most efficient use of funds designed to ‘enhance’ the lives of DC residents.

Does anyone else feel deprived on a daily basis that by the fact that they are currently unable to get to Dulles by means other than the super shuttle, taxi, or bus??? Trust me, there are many things that keep me up at night. Greater accessibility to Dulles is NOT one of them.

Even if Dulles were located in Silver Spring, I would prefer DCA. It’s closer to DC, lines are shorter, security is more efficient for the frequent flyers among us, terminals within walkable distance of each other and accessed without the use of a little space-like pod from the first terminal to the next. If these weren’t enough reasons to make the average DC Metro rider shake their heads at this mammoth and in my estimation COMPLETELY UNESSARY project, the following are:

SCARLETT'S TOP TEN WAYS TO BETTER SPEND $1.63 BILLION IMPROVING THE LIVES OF DC AREA RESIDENTS:

#10. Homeless Shelters. Invest the money in more homeless shelters to house/care for/rehabilitate the residents of McPherson Square/Dupont Circle/Franklin Park/ 15^th St so they’ll stop bugging me every time I walk out of my local Starbucks or the Dupont CVS.

#9. Projects in Progress. Finish what you start. Now I’m no I-95 road warrior, but I do venture out on a Zip Car from time to time. Correct me if I’m wrong, but aren’t there several highway construction projects around Alexandria, The Woodrow Wilson Bridge, and various traffic jam issues that should be finished/fixed before creating a brand new mess???

#8. Clean up the Potomac. ‘Nuff Said.

#7. Reduce Tolls/Metro Fare. As I understand it, the poor car drivers that caravan up and down the Dulles toll-road will help in footing this bill through increased tolls. That HARDLY seems fair seeing as how it’s the people with CARS who will NOT be utilizing the Silver Line as they, well….DRIVE places instead of metro. Most car owners love their vehicles – good luck in convincing them that lugging their to-be checked and carried on luggage through the beautiful efficiency that is the DC metro rail system the better way to go to the airport.

#6. Invest in more busses. Ever morning, without fail, I wait for the bus. 10, 15, twenty minutes in either the freezing cold or dreadfully humid air (take your pic as DC weather is in one way or another abysmal 85% of the year). Take the money, buy some more busses (of which the majority are now eco friendly), pay some more bus drivers and put some more busses on the road because unless you’re riding the 42 line, chances are you’re waiting a while for a bus).

#5. Fix/keep the tracks already in place in working order. Every single weekend, without fail I, and hundreds of DC residents and tourists flocking to the nation’s capital, are inconvenienced by ‘routine track maintenance’ causing 20, 30 or in some cases 40 minute intervals between trains leading to inevitable overcrowding, pushing, shoving, and all around unhappy people. Especially when these people are waiting on outdoor platforms in the freezing winter air.

#4. Replace Outdated Metro Cars. Continue the process of replacing the metro cars that are still sporting orange carpet circa 1973 with the newer, carpetless and more efficient (in terms of passenger capacity) metro cars.

#3. The National Mall. Take the $1.6 Billion and grow some grass, clean monuments, plant flowers – beautify one of the most historic and recognizable symbols of American democracy, legacy and history. Put in a irrigation system in the summer to keep the grass from being singed like a piece of hair on a curling iron in the summer, keep the reflecting pool..well….reflecting instead of a murky mess.

#2. Metro Stops. There has yet to be a convenient metro stop in Georgetown, Adams Morgan, or a more efficient way to go from Cleveland Park to Columbia Heights without traveling via China Town! Ever thought of making actual DC neighborhoods more metro accessible before making Bumble-Fuck Virginia easier to get to!? Hell, my friends can’t even get me to go out in ARLINGTON, let alone travel to Reston!

And the #1 way to better spend $1.63 Billion than a metro line to Dulles Airport....(drum roll please.....)

#1. Law Enforcement. While the DC crime rate has dropped like a stone since its peak in the mid 90s, violent crime was reported to be more than three time the national average of 466.9 reported offenses per 100,000 people in 2007. Spend the $1.63 billion on more police officers, their salaries and benefits. Not being killed/raped/assaulted is of FAR greater value to me than riding the metro out to Dulles.

Could someone please point out the silver line-ing to this monstrous project? If you disagree, I’d LOVE to hear why.

Frankly,

Sex and the Red Carpet

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Mon, 23 Feb 2009 09:43:00 -0600

Instead of regaling you with tales of my date with Irish on Friday (i.e. the BEST SEX of my LIFE) – I've chosen to add a few opinions and commentary on last night's Oscar celebration. After all, what kind of pop-culture obsessed, aspiring bitchy fashionista would I be if I didn’t give you a play by play of the red carpet??

There I was, watching all of the glitz, the glam, the extensions…in tres fabulous homebody mode in boxer shorts, a grey, faded U of M sweatshirt, my favorite pink, fuzzy slippers and the perfect accessory: a freshly popped bottle of champange. What more could a girl want, right? Well, I'll tell you. I WANT TO WEAR A PRETTY DRESS and spend hours having my hair done, my makeup professionally applied, my nails manicured, spray tan applied and my own personal fashion consultant!!!!

Sigh. Pout.

But even in the far more subdued glamour style of fuzzy slippers I still felt compelled to provide a stream of conscious-type commentary.

The Oscars: The Good

Of course the Oscars bring out the beautiful people of the silver screen - however - watching all of these just incredibly stunning women makes me just want to give up!

Penelope – you looked AMAZING!!! While I prefer you in your signature black dress, you looked equally alluring in your pale shaded ball gown. Equally poised was your acceptance speech. Bravo.

Natalie Portman – I frequently reel over her performance in "Closer", but she is just such a perpetually stunning woman.

Kate Winslet – Congrats to you, Kate with your Academy Award and thank you for giving us girls with curves something to aspire to (i.e. not size negative 4). Also, hands down my favorite dress of the night (with Reese Witherspoon coming in at a close second). Apparently the one shoulder statement was tres en vogue this year. I’ll have to remember that for my next black tie event….of course by the time that comes around – who knows!?

Angelina: YES YES for the green jewelry with the black dress. Understated. Classic. Bravo.

Jen: GOOD FOR YOU! Way to walk on stage looking stunning directly in front of your ex and the women that he left you for. I know I personally could not do it with your grace and poise no matter now many millions of people were watching. Then again they were on a 7 second delay and who knows WHAT went on in the theatre while they were rolling the animation clips. What do you think Brad was thinking as he watched her? Hm.

Incidentally – did you see the RED!? Yea for the comeback of the red dress, Amy Adams, Heidi Klum and several others!!!

The Frightful

Woopi – ware you going on safari??? I’m all for leopard print honey but seriously, if Joy doesn’t berate you on the View tomorrow for your ~~fashion~~…choice of dress…that is blatant censorship.

SJP – Maybe I’m just not ‘in the know’ or fashion forward enough to appreciate this “mint” colored froufrou dress. Carrie – you know I love ya, but ….I wasn’t a fan.

Beyoncee – May I just say, “no”. NO NO NO. She looked like a piece of Greek pottery! This dress violated every rule of curvy girl fashion, mainly #1 - NO MERMAID DRESSES! Those dresses are for women who have figures a la 10-year old boys and need at accentuate any curves they have.

Jessica Biel – was I the only one who thought her dress looked like the towel that I wrap around myself when I come out of the shower? Seriously – it looks like she wrapped some fabric around herself and then tucked it in in front.

Thus conculdes my not so deep Oscar Night thoughts.

Now back to the sex.

To make a long story short (and I will share the long story at another time) – when I said “the BEST sex EVER” – I wasn’t referring to literal physical intimacy. I was referring to the absolute INSANE fantasies that plagued me all weekend following the hands down, most amazingly sexy kiss, I’ve EVER received. Definitely an Oscar worthy leading man.

Pink Moods

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Fri, 16 Jan 2009 08:07:00 -0600

Courtesey of PinkNic - I thought this was a fun little quote for Friday (even if it IS about pink instead of red). I've been thinking a lot about belief and so its appropriate.

Hopefully by now, I will have landed safely in the UK. If not, I'm tredding water or floating on a piece of twisted steel somewhere over the general direction of Titanic wreckage in the middle of the North Atlantic. Either way, have a lovely weekend!

"I believe in pink. I believe that laughing is the best calorie burner. I believe in kissing, kissing a lot. I believe in being strong when everything goes wrong. I believe that happy girls are the prettiest girls. I believe that tomorrow is another day, and I believe in miracles"
-Audrey Hepburn

U.S. Airways Gets COAL from SANTA!

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Wed, 24 Dec 2008 10:26:11 -0600

I have been on the phone with U.S. Airways for the past 90 Minutes and I may or may not be going home for Christmas due not to the blizzards flurrying around the country - but MECHANICAL DIFFICULTIES!! Un-fucking believeable.

I want to cry.

Anyone feel like praying for a Christmas miracle for moi?

Just What My Ass Needs

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 16:09:49 -0600

All I need is a great big bow on my ass....as if it could get any bigger!

I Vote: YES, Please!

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Wed, 03 Sep 2008 10:28:10 -0500

On a lighter note – the political conventions.

I will refrain from thoughts on the speeches made, views espoused and promises undertaken and leave that genre of commentary to those eminently more qualified than myself (though I’m quite pissed at that whole “can she be the Vice President AND a mother” statement. A comment that should infuriate any women who has ever called herself a feminist – but that’s a topic for another post).

But what NO ONE is talking about – what NO ONE has brought up – what NO ONE has thought to mention…perhaps the most important factor in this election…..right up there with world peace and starving children:

McCain’s sons (Jimmy & Jack) are HOT!! I noticed them during last night’s news coverage. Watch out Prince William & Harry – these boys might just have you beat! And yes, they’re a tad young for moi, however….SO cute! Then again, I seem to be on a “men in uniform” kick as of late.

So for your information and edification :

Jack is 22 and is attending his fourth (1st Class) year at the U.S. Naval Academy in Annapolis, Maryland. He hopes to become a naval aviator. He was born and raised in Arizona and attended Phoenix Country Day Elementary and Brophy College Preparatory High School. He enjoys amateur car racing and has built his own race car. He competes in Drift racing and recently took his Mom with him in the passenger seat during a race.

Jim is 20 and a Private First Class in the Marine Corps. He was born in Phoenix, Arizona and attended Christ Lutheran Elementary School and Brophy College Preparatory High School. His lifelong dream was to become a Marine. He is an avid reader and often shares books with his father.

Frankly, these are the IMPORTANT issues, kids - and we should ALL strive to be more informed!

Frankly,

Vogue Gets a Little Bit Hotter

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Wed, 20 Aug 2008 10:55:40 -0500

It's been awhile since I've done one of these - but it was so good, I just couldn't resist! Enjoy!

A New Flame: Revenge of the Carrot Tops

Last Updated: 12:01am BST 06/08/2008

After centuries in the cold, redheads are suddenly a hot commodity, says Hannah Betts

Notice anything curious about the cover of September's Vogue? Beautiful girl, check; Prada frock, tick; enthusiastic lipstick scrawl singing "Glorious!" So far, so Condé Nast. And then comes the realization: Mother of God, the beautiful girl in question has red hair and is thus - according to the savage logic of the playground - a "ginger nut" or a "Duracell". She's a "carrot top".

Flaming heck: Karen Elson is only the seventh redhead to grace the cover of Vogue

Seeing red at redheads has been cited as Britain's last socially acceptable form of bigotry - and not without foundation. Even the ravishing Karen Elson, the beauty who graces the magazine's frontage, was known as "Le Freak" on entering the industry, and "fake model" at school where her peers were incredulous that she could earn money from her appearance.

Statistics from Vogue House confirm that this is only the seventh occasion a woman with russet hair has graced its cover since 1970. Despite the need for Italian Vogue's consciousness-raising all-black issue this July, there have still been more British Vogue covers featuring black women than Titian-haired ones. Yet red-headed people make up between four and 13 per cent of the population - depending upon where one looks in the United Kingdom - while the black population hovers at just under two per cent.

Alexandra Shulman's editor's letter smacks somewhat of justification. She notes that Elson's "pale beauty and flaming hair make her a vivid figurehead for this distinctive season"; surely the fashion equivalent of getting to play a tree in an autumnal school play.

Evolutionary psychology suggests that gingers are shunned because they are a minority - pack mentality dictating that those who are different should be ostracised. Despite red hair being a staple of children's fiction - Anne of Green Gables, Pippi Longstocking, Little Orphan Annie - historically it has been perceived as diabolical. Judas Iscariot, Mary Magdalene and Salome have all been depicted as carrot tops, while the pairing of red hair and green eyes was thought to denote a witch, werewolf, or vampire.

advertisementIt's unsurprising, then, that for every proud flame-thrower - a Tilda Swinton, Julianne Moore, or Gillian Anderson - there is a Lindsay Lohan, Nicole Kidman or Geri Halliwell itching to douse their locks with peroxide.

The Celtic Tudors may have fostered a century-long trend for strawberry blonde tresses. However, our own Prince Harry was picked on for his colouring at school, and has been over-looked in the swoon stakes - despite being considerably better looking than the heir to which he is spare.

That said, he has obviously fared better than the Chapmans, the Newcastle family who found fame in 2007 for being forced to relocate three times in three years because of their colouring - provoking the local council to suggest they take to the (L'Oréal) bottle. Despite a proud legacy that numbers Boudicca, Oliver Cromwell, and Winston Churchill as fellow members, comedian Catherine Tate's sketch in which ginger outcasts are forced to seek solace in a refuge would appear to be not far from the mark.

The red-headed reputation for being hot-tempered and hypersensitive to pain may be because they get such a raw deal. By comparison, blondes - Vogue's preferred colour for its cover girls - are thought to be attractive because they resemble children. Hair darkens as we hit puberty, thus fairness is associated with innocence, the tow-haired vulnerability of youth. And, where there is vulnerability, so there will be those that seek to exploit it, viz Alfred Hitchock's remark: "Blondes make the best victims. They're like virgin snow that shows up the bloody footprints." If this is the kind of fun that blondes get to have more of, then there are many of us who will be entirely happy chugging along under a cloud of murky, sludgy brown.

For where redheads get to be the victimised minority, and blondes life's attention seekers, so brunettes boast locks that qualify them as normal human beings.

Last week, it was reported that a survey of 3,000 women by colourists Schwarzkopf & Henkel found that, on average, brunettes earn £4,250 more per annum than golden girls. It also found that those with chestnut tresses are 10 per cent more sexually successful than blondes. And they have featured on more Vogue covers than one might expect: the blonde-brunette cover-girl ratio being a mere 60:40 over the last 40 years.

And so to the burning issue: will Elson's immortalisation prompt a rash of imitators? For the truly voguish mane, will red indeed be on fire this season? Certainly, Bottega Veneta, Chloé, Celine, Sisley, Tiffany and Miu Miu's new autumn campaigns all feature flaming heroines. But those tempted may wish to consider further Schwarzkopf & Henkel research. While red is the hue that the majority of colour chameleons initially opt to embrace, the brand also discovered that it is the shade they ditch the fastest, after an average of merely two years. Still, that's a few seasons longer than most fashion trends.

Information appearing on telegraph.co.uk is the copyright of Telegraph Media Group Limited and must not be reproduced in any medium without license. For the full copyright statement see Copyright

No News is…FUCKING FRUSTRATING

scarlett@thescarlettletters.com (Scarlett) — Thu, 24 Jul 2008 10:44:25 -0500

The BBC – is the ONLY television news service I seem to be able to stomach these days. It is the only channel that isn’t giving updates of hurricane Dolly every twelve seconds (its raining, its windy – we get it already!) I mean seriously, what is there to be gained from the blurred images projected through rain soaked and wind pummeled lenses?

I seriously hope they find the poor little two year old that’s missing, but really – do I NEED a visual tour of her room? I HAVE to listen to another update with her lunatic grandmother screaming at reporters?

And if I have to see ONE MORE IMAGE of Barak O’Bama in a Yamaka touring the West Bank, I’m going to SCREAM. (Don’t get me wrong, every hoarse, strained, mundane speech given by his Republican counterpart is less than inspiring.). But you’d think this were Nixon going into Communist China or Regan stepping foot into Russia for the first time since Tsarist Russia the way this diplomatic cabaret has been celebrated and covered. It's reminicent of Eva Peron's equally celebrated: Rainbow Tour. (Sing it with me now!)

And at the risk of sounding US-centric and thus opening the door to being verbally throttled – why do we care who the Europeans (Germany and France in particular) want to be our next president?? Because the last time I checked the United States has both kicked and saved their asses, respectively - twice, within the past century. Since when has the election for the American Presidency taken on the pallor of global opinion?

I understand – strategically - the need to visually inject the steroid of foreign policy and/or diplomatic experience into the aspiring candidate’s resume. However, I can’t ignore the fact that the entire spectacle is making me ill.

Thank GOD for the BBC.

Frankly,

On a more positive note: It is the most fucking GEORGOUS morning I can remember in a LONG time. The breeze cooled by the night rain, the only traces of humidity left by the storms seem to be the puddles on the ground, the sky serving as a muse for Crayola blue. Sigh. Just beautiful.